For many women, confidence is a feeling that comes and goes.
It can leave us when we need it the most, and stray for decades before we figure out how to get it back.
Yes, real confidence comes from within.
But for most of us— that's a really tall order.
Usually, we think we NEED therapy, or to lose a few pounds, or to get a better outfit, or do more research before we have permission to practice confidence.
But guess what? The science says... NOT TRUE!
Keep reading for my top 2 strategies to find your confidence and begin practicing it right now.
To start, do you remember these two women from Secret deodorant commercials? Meet Ash and Emma, two ambitious young women ready to join the “boys club”. But not without first prepping in the elevator and pumping each other up.
In the second commercial of this series, we see one of them standing in bear pose while the other one cheers her on:
"You are a bear. You dominate, you're brilliant, articulate. Yes, those numbers are correct. Yes, those projections are feasible— Because you're killing it"
What these two rock stars are doing is nothing more than positive affirmations.
Science proves that stating positive, bold statements about yourself combined with a power pose has a POWERFUL effect on the stories you believe about yourself.
Basically, Fake it till you make it (in Superwoman stance)
It's actually, scientifically, what many successful people start off doing.
Think of "faking it" like the training wheels you put on just to get the confidence ball rolling. Once you're up, you'll leave them behind without even noticing, and it will just be you up there, confidence-ing around like you own the place.
So show up; walk the walk; talk the talk... Smile big, shake the hands. Emote confidence, and the real confidence will follow.
1. Affirm Yourself
I am are two of the most powerful words; what you put after them shapes your reality. I am statements have powerful effects on your psyche: Your mood improves, your negative self-talk diminishes, and you will start to feel lighter and more energized. Choose whatever you want to visualize yourself as or choose from this list of proven I am statements:
Do the Work
If you’ve been on a negative spiral for a while, you may have trouble coming up with a list of positive affirmations.
I promise you that if make a conscious effort to adopt a different way of thinking, the brain circuits that processed your old way of thinking begin to fade.
2. Strike A (Power) Pose
Did you know that body language impacts the levels of testosterone and cortisol in your body? According to research from Harvard University and several others, the levels of each hormone can change rapidly depending on the social, physical, and environmental cues that surround you.
Why does this matter? Because higher levels of testosterone help you feel more confident. At the same time, lower levels of cortisol lead to decreased anxiety and an improved ability to deal with stress.
The bottom line is that saying positive affirmations is just one part of it; your body has to play along as well.
To engage your senses, try saying the affirmations in front of the mirror while engaging in a power pose. Visualize the affirmation and act it out!